Monthly Archives: January 2013

Overprotectiveness and Holding Our Kids Back

As you might know already, parenting daughters has taught me a lot about trust. Letting my daughters go is one of the hardest thing for me to do and they aren’t even teenagers yet. Now that both our daughters are in elementary school, I have even more opportunities to trust.

Recently, I have been driving to work in the mornings so I drive our daughters to school instead of walking them to school. Norah, our kindergardner really likes to have me drop them off in the circle drive instead of parking and walking them to their classroom door. I enjoy waiting with Norah and the other kids for the teacher to open the door and let them into class. Other parents wait outside with their kids as well.

For the past couple of days, I have put aside my trust issues and overprotectiveness, and dropped the girls off in the circle drive in front of the school. I can’t even look in the rearview mirror at “little” Norah walks to her classroom. It’s too hard for me right now. I admit it. I’m a sappy dad.

But I know that by dropping Norah off and letting her walk to her classroom, she is learning responsibility and starting the process of becoming an independent woman. It is better for her development even though it is hard for me.

How do we as parents stifle our child’s growth because of our own insecurities and trust issues?

For more on overprotectiveness, responsibility and letting our kids fail, read this great article from the Atlantic.

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Developing a Personal Growth Plan

Once we stop formal schooling, our personal development still needs to continue. In some ways, if we are intentional about our personal development, we can grow more outside of the classroom than we can within. We learn more by doing, especially when we document and reflect on what we are doing.

During my time at Denver Seminary, we all went through a Training and Mentoring program where we developed learning contracts to guide our personal growth. Each student developed learning contract for character development and skill development.

In my role at Mountair Christian Church, my lead pastor and I decided to develop learning contacts for the spring. Without intentional personal growth plans we wouldn’t be purposeful in our development.

So we each wrote a learning contract for skill development and character development. It is amazing how just developing a plan keeps me focused on what I need to learn.

Here is my skill contract for the spring.

Here are links to templates for developing your own skill development and character development contracts in Word and Pages format.

Let me know if this tool helps you.

The F-Word and Leadership

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Ten years ago a friend and I brought a dream into reality and started a coffee bar at Denver Seminary. We had dreams that Kurios Koffee would someday get bought out by Starbucks and we would get some extra cash. For two years we made just enough money to break even and enjoy free coffee. We even jumped into coffee catering and brought our coffee equipment to weddings and church events.

Then Denver Seminary decided to move to a brand new campus in Littleton and I bought out my business partner as he was moving out of town. I took out business loans to fund new equipment for a bigger space at the new campus and was excited for what could be at the new space. Kurios Koffee incorporated and the business systems went to the next level.  Read the rest of this entry